Psychiatric Help, Five Boonbucks Memo (open)

[maieuticEpimenides]

tentacleTherapist [TT] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board Psychiatric Help (Five Boonbucks).

TT: It goes without saying that the majority of you, drifting so helplessly about in paradox space, suffer from a plenitude of mental illnesses. Disorders. Conditions. It's unfortunate how synonyms are permitted to procreate so freely in this wreck of a language in which we speak. But I trust you've grasped my meaning.
TT: Then again, maybe you're just stupid.
TT: Either way, I'm here to help.
TT: And if it makes anyone feel better, I charge five boonbucks for every excruciating minute of wholly wasted time. Consider it a warning. (And also a humorous reference of the subtlest kind. Or the most hamfisted. It's entirely contingent on you.)
TT: Enlighten me. Talk.

[sleeplessCartoonist]

LJ: Well, I suppose I've gathered up plenty of boonbucks in my session, so there's no harm spending a little
LJ: I have, er, had, a father who was incredibly
LJ: Um, harsh
LJ: And while I expected this whole grief thing to be over and mend any bitter feelings I had towards him shortly after he died I still feel really upset about how he raised me
LJ: I mean, his expectations were unreal!
LJ: And he never said he loved me or anything before he died, though to be fair the whole giant imp thing was a little sudden
LJ: But I can't get over it! What's with that? Is there any sort of way to forget about him?

[Loki]

sH: I am not sure. If this is a good idea. But.
sH: I feel. As if I do not deserve my place. In the Hemospectrum. And this drove me. To isolate myself. Living so far North. That I could go three Sweeps. Without seeing another Troll.
sH: It has also. Led to me having difficulty. In expressing myself. And I was unable to confess my flushed feelings. Until after the death. Of the Troll they are aimed at.

[maieuticEpimenides]

TT: Fascinating.
TT: Sburb (or Sgrub, I believe, in the case of trolls) generally sees to it that players experience a variety of guardian-related issues, as I'm sure you're well aware. 
TT: My own relationship with my deceased mother was unstable at best.
TT: But you seem very concerned with your late father figure's feelings towards you, LJ.
TT: I'm not going to lie.
TT: In all likelihood, you won't forget him. And why exactly do you claim to feel such a desire?
TT: On the other hand, it can't hurt for you address your own feelings.
TT: Did you resent his expectations because you wanted to meet them?
TT: Did you love your father, LJ?
TT: And in response to the gratuitously-punctuated statements of the presumably teal-blooded troll SH:
TT: Your ability to recognize your difficulties is commendable.
TT: I assume I'm obligated to urge you to take action. To improve.
TT: But I've been over this. I'm attempting the utmost sincerity and honesty here.
TT: You have to motivate yourself.
TT: I think
apocalypseArisen [AA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
AA: oh my god i just saw this
AA: rose what are you doing?
TT: I'm helping.
AA: i cant believe this
AA: so very noble of you!
AA: although i heard you yourself were kind of in rainbow rumpus rehab town so to speak
TT: I am. Consider it a group effort to rid ourselves of our various mental maladies.
AA: ok then
AA: im not going to spoil your psychoanalysis party!
AA: i was merely checking up on you
AA: also this is an excellent idea
AA: rehabilitation memos could be all the rage in the dreambubbles soon
AA: i have more than enough on my hands
AA: i could make a human support group for ghosts!
AA: im sure they would have a lovely time discussing and coming to grips with the circumstances and results of their various deaths
AA: a welcoming environment in which such things are not as taboo as they might be in others
AA: a community of the deceased!
TT: Megido, I hate to break it to you, but I fear you yourself may be in need of some five boonbuck psychiatric advice.
AA: oh no thats already been explained to me more than once
AA: im more than content as I am!
TT: I'm going to charge you double for this, then.
TT: I'm afraid I've given myself no other alternative.


[OOC EDIT: And that's what happens when you get carried away trying to RP two overly talkative nutjobs in a memo. Whoops. Sorry.]

[Loki]

sH: Well. I was really hoping for something more. Than 'you have to motivate yourself'. Not that I don't appreciate it. It's just that. It doesn't really help.

[maieuticEpimenides]

TT: Well, how do you understand your isolation to be limiting your expression?
TT: Is it merely hesitation resulting from lack on contact?
TT: And, from what I hear, a troll's blood caste is hardly earned.
TT: You'll have to pardon any misconceptions on my part, seeing as I'm a human.
TT: Blood color is an attribute of your species that is not determined by choice.
TT: Admittedly, I would assume these matters to be more of a Heart player's domain, but I should think that your identity in regards to blood caste is hardly anything to doubt.
TT: You seem reasonable.
TT: I'd suggest that you train that eye of reason on yourself.
TT: I can't tell you that you're worthy. I don't know you.
TT: Do you possess a close friend-slash-confidant in which you could attempt to confide, as practice?
TT: Clearly, you're not the confiding sort. I sympathize.
TT: But perhaps you could make the effort.
TT: And if you can't, why would that be?
TT: Why would you think it'd be?

[sleeplessCartoonist]

LJ: Did I want to meet his expectations?
LJ: Well, I mean
LJ: He did seem pretty much constantly disappointed in me
LJ: But I can't meet his expectations, that's impossible for me
LJ: So I want to forget about him and all of his pressure!
LJ: Did I love him? I guess
LJ: Though he seemed significantly more interested in grieving my long-dead mother rather than
LJ: You know, raising me
LJ: And what if I somehow end up meeting him in a dreambubble? What if I die and am stuck with him forever?
LJ: I don't know, the whole subject makes me feel sick

Future corruptData [CD] started responding to memo 19 HOURS FROM NOW
CD: yo otis.
FCD: im pretty sure youre gonna run out of boonbucks if you keep going on like that
FCD: also that doesnt happen.
FCD: pretty sure it cant.
LJ: Sorry
LJ: Are you saying I'm going to die soon?
FCD: enough focus on your problems dude. let someone else have a turn.

[Loki]

sH: You are correct. In that our caste is not earned. But I have never acted as Cerulean's should. And this makes me think that. Maybe. I'm a mutation.
sH: And. I did have someone. That I might have been able to talk to. But I recently. Attempted to kill him. Twice. So I do not think that is an option.
sH: And your assumption about this being. The domain of a Heart player. Does not instill confidence, as I myself am a Heart player.

[maieuticEpimenides]

TT: Interesting. So certain behavior is expected of each blood caste?
TT: In any case, it appears that some Sburb classes tend to work against rather than with their aspects.
TT: Initially, that is.
TT: It wouldn't surprise me should a Heart player be troubled in these matters.
TT: Also, LJ
TT: Or Otis?
TT: As always, it's difficult to assess situations involving strangers.
AA: not necessarily!
TT: Pardon?
AA: im aware that human lusus figures usually behave differently from troll equivalents
AA: but since this seems to be veering towards the subject of dreambubbles and death
AA: i dont think you should worry!
AA: death is a perspective-altering experience to say the least
AA: any potential ghost interactions between you and your guardian
AA: (which will number in the few considering that player ghosts are far more common)
AA: i might recommend it!
AA: see its not the same after you die
AA: and i think maybe you need to consider how your guardian felt!
AA: rose?
TT: Well. Generally, I'd think that high expectations indicate a higher opinion of the individual under pressure.
TT: It's possible that whatever may have troubled your late father
TT: Including but not limited to his grief over your mother, as you mentioned before,
TT: He may not have intended to pressure you to the point of consulting strangers that charge you 300 boonbucks an hour for their prattle.
TT: Speaking of which, I'm going to charge you slightly less for this. I wouldn't want you to run out of boonbucks.
TT: And Aradia seems to have taken an interest in your case. I don't believe she requires payment for any of her burgundy-tinted advice. At least, she hasn't indicated otherwise.
TT: And I'm not going to stop her, either, as my current de-facto assistant.
TT: Maid of Rose, you might say.
TT: It's the greatest of honors.
AA: yes im flattered
AA: i can be head of the postmortem communications department too
AA: consultant of morbid affairs
TT: Don't forget your role as Chair of the Cheerers' Board. Rainbow Rumpus Rehab Town could always use some help in that particular area, most unfortunately.
AA: of course
AA: that goes without saying!
AA: :D

[sleeplessCartoonist]

LJ: I suppose, if I were to meet him in a dreambubble, that could give some closure
LJ: And apparently I'm going to die? So that's all eternity to look for him
FCD: i said no such thing.
LJ: You hinted at it
FCD: did not. anyways you should have bigger things on your mind. like your alien boyfriend or something.
FCD: so aa. youre good at dealing with death problems then? good.
FCD: because have i got a big glaring death issue which does not involve my deceased aunt who never loved me because i dont whine about those kinds of things.
LJ: ...
FCD: i had a friend who died because of me. and i feel absolutely awful about it.
FCD: she died trying to save me and then when i met her in a dreambubble she said she was fine with being dead and uh. liked me and stuff.
LJ: Iris dies too???
FCD: this doesnt concern you. anyways i of course am shocked and everything and turn her down. she then gets like really pissed at me.
FCD: i thought she was whining about nothing until i realized that i would have been dead if it wasnt for her. so now i feel bad especially since i made it to god tier even though everyone i care for is dead.
FCD: and now i cant die. but i kind of wish i can?
FCD: tl;dr i pretty much killed my friend who had a crush on me and i turned her down and i feel like a douche.

[Loki]

aG: Heeeeeeeey Rose ::::]
aG: And Megido........ Gr8.
aG: And FCD???????? You are a hugeeeeeeee douche.
aG: Reallyyyyyyyy, if I were you I would just dig myself a hole and hide in it.

[maieuticEpimenides]

AA: vriska!
AA: nice hearing from you
AA: youre as amicable as ever!
AA: also id recommend that you put some effort into making everyone feel welcome here
AA: as of right now i think youre in need of some improvement
AA: fcd may have acted like a douche but our goal here is to remedy that!
TT: I concur.
TT: But while we're still greeting each other:
TT: (Or are we reprimanding Vriska now?)
TT: Hello, Vriska.
TT: I don't believe we were ever given the opportunity to get properly acquainted.
AA: you havent?
TT: Not really. Care to introduce us?
AA: oh no im sure im not the one to do the introduction
AA: she should do so herself!
AA: anyway i believe we were discussing fcd here?
TT: You presume correctly. Proceed, Postmortem Consultant Aradia.
AA: proceed i shall!
AA: fcd i think it would be best for us to first establish that the desire to die is hardly a healthy one
TT: Suicide is never the answer?
AA: yes thats a given
AA: seeing as your friend is a ghost and youve found her before i believe you can still make amends
AA: life goes on even after death
AA: and in the end you have to accept that it happens
AA: it doesnt help to feel guilty
AA: think of it this way:
AA: you havent done anything wrong per se
AA: the deaths were a necessity
AA: i cant say that it isnt sad when friends die
AA: but it happens and they continue to exist even if as ghosts!
AA: so dont think of it as an end
AA: death is only a continuation!

[sleeplessCartoonist]

FCD: i was only being honest ag.
FCD: or vriska apparently.
FCD: i suppose i could go make amends with future otis and future iris.
LJ: Do I get upset at you at some point, along with dying?
FCD: ive given enough spoilers man.
FCD: she kind of scares me now though.

Past wishfulWisher [WW] started responding to memo 10 MINUTES AGO
PWW: Is someone talking about me?????
FCD: jfc

Future corruptData [FCD] has ceased responding to memo.

PWW: Weird! I wonder what's gotten into him? :/
LJ: This is becoming a bit of a clusterfuck
PWW: That's not a word.
LJ: You know what I mean

[maieuticEpimenides]

AA: hey there!
AA: might you be iris?
AA: fcd was talking about you
AA: if you dont want spoilers i suggest you refrain from scrolling through this memos history
AA: not everyone takes to hearing the future
AA: time travel is regrettably not suited to us all
TT: The option's always present, of course.
AA: yes
AA: but you could label it as a temptation as well
AA: if you catch my drift
AA: pww i suggest that you use your best judgment though
FUTURE saccharinePharmakos [FSP] 12:08 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo.
FSP: Okay what kind of asshole party is this?
FSP: I think Im psupposed to be doing psomething
FSP: But psuddenly psome idiot fucktard pstarts trolling me and I get psidetracked
FSP: I mean its pso fucking annoying.
AA: what
FSP: Just give it a psec.
FSP: One
FSP: Two
FSP: Three
FSP: Bam.
PAST guilefulDiscernment [PGD] 4:23 HOURS AGO responded to memo.
PGD: 'sup, guys?
PGD: (pssst sachar...)
PGD: (the hell are you doing?)
PGD: (this is clearly a SERI~O~US memo discussing SERI~O~US things!)
FSP: (Oh pshut up.)
PGD: (they obviously don't need you barging on in here and talking about your lousy problems!)
FSP: (Im psorry I wasnt the idiot who psent me here)
FSP: (Know why? Im not an idiot.)
PGD: (ahaaa beg to differ!)
FSP: (Youre not listening to me!)
PGD: (do i ever?)
FSP: (Thats not the point.)
FSP: (Argh.)
PGD: (oh my god)
PGD: (i just got it!)
PGD: (yesss! i am the most awesome troll ever to live this is BRILLIANT!)
FSP: (No youre not.)
PGD: (yes i PS~O~ totally am and you are the biggest PSUCKER ever!)
FSP: (Okay now youre way over the line. Pstop it.)
PGD: (go find FGD and high five her for me!)
FSP: (Fuck no. Im busy. Preoccupied. Also this is all her fault.)
TT: I'm sorry, but I haven't the slightest idea what the two of you are talking about.
TT: Is this particularly relevant, or are you simply here to bicker about an issue that, despite potentially being something worth discussion here, will merely remain a side conversation in which the general populace of our metaphorical rehabilitation facility cannot participate?
PGD: well, i was going to participate in the general conversation here!
PGD: weirdo sucker FSP over there just kind of ruined it, i fear!
FSP: Excuse me?
PGD: you heard me! weirdo sucker FSP for life, you are!
FSP: I dont have time for this.
PGD: actually, i bet you do
PGD: isn't that just kind of what you say whenever you get pissed at someone?
FSP: No.
FSP: Perhaps youve heard of whats called a WILD ASSUMPTION?
PGD: nope, can't say i have!
TT: Wait, no, my previous statements have been temporarily redacted. You two are personally invited to stay on as quadrant vacillation consultants.
FSP: Oh fuck no.
FSP: What the hell are you trying to imply, anyway?
PGD: oh PSHUT UP! that is equally brilliant as FGD and yes we shall stay!
FSP: Fuck that.
PGD: on the contrary, this wooouuuld make you actually busy for once...
FSP: Fuck.
AA: ...
AA: ok
AA: i think im going to agree with otis here
AA: this is becoming quite the clusterfuck!

[sleeplessCartoonist]

LJ: I hope the fee isn't getting too high
PWW: Fee? Oh, there's a fee! Otis, what are you doing in a 'Psychiatric Help' memo?
LJ: I am mourning over the loss of my father and looked for help
PWW: Awwwww! D:
PWW: You could have come to your friends!
LJ: I'd rather not bother you with these things
PWW: You wouldn't be! Anyhoo, I'd rather not read what's up there. I like surprises! And I'm perfectly happy as is, sooooo, I'll be going!

Past wishfulWisher [PWW] has ceased responding to memo.

LJ: Talking to her has now become depressing

marchingSoldier [MS] has begun responding to thread RIGHT NOW.

MS: I dOn't lIkE tUrnIng tO OthErs fOr hElp, bUt I hAvE accUmUlAtEd qUItE A sUm Of bOOnbUcks. SO, whY nOt. >O<
LJ: Oh
MS: OtIs.
LJ: Haidan
LJ: What are you here for?
MS: I Am nOt As InsUscEptIblE tO EmOtIOnAl hArm As yOU mAy thInk.
MS: I Am hErE tO bE cOnsUltEd bY thIs ElEgAnt hIghblOOd And thIs... lEss ElEgAnt And vAgUElY strAngE lOwblOOd.
LJ: Oh
LJ: No, cool
LJ: I was just uh
LJ: Leaving
MS: YOU'rE hErE AbOUt yOUr cUstOdIAn.
LJ: Yes, why are you asking
MS: ThAt wAsn't A qUEstIOn, I wAs stAtIng A fAct.
LJ: Oh right
LJ: Well yes why are you reading everything in the memo
MS: I Am cUrIOUs AbOUt hOw yOU ArE dOIng.
LJ: There's no need watching me spill my guts for that, you can ask me
MS: Oh I'vE AlrEAdY wAtchEd yOUr gUts spIll.

lumberingJack [LJ] has ceased responding to memo.

[Loki]

aG: Aaaaaaaaw, come oooooooon Rose!!!!!!!!
aG: How can you say that we weren't really acquainted????????
aG: Or are you a past Rose????????
aG: From my perspective.

[maieuticEpimenides]

TT: I wouldn't know about that.
TT: All I can say is that your primary interactions with my session were with John.
TT: Although I recall him using my Pesterchum account to contact you multiple times, which was interesting.
TT: I made a considerable effort not to pry, by the way.
TT: In any case, can't we both agree that we've plenty of room to know each other better?
TT: Also, I was embarrassingly inebriated for a while there. 'A while there' referring to a long period of time in which I hear you were up to quite a lot.
TT: We have some catching up to do, don't you think?
AA: wait guys
AA: exactly what do you mean by spilling guts?
AA: haidan or whatever your name happens to be
AA: whats going on exactly?
AA: is lj dead when you are?
AA: (when as in where)
AA: (like where you are except when you are)
AA: (just clarifying)
PGD: god, i have no idea what's going on here...
AA: dont worry!
AA: youre not alone
PGD: time here is pretty complicated!
AA: after a while you get the hang of it
AA: :)
PGD: yeah...
PGD: i'd certainly hope so
FSP: Wow
FSP: This is pso pstupid.
PGD: no, you're the stupid one!
FSP: Cut it out. Its getting old
PGD: oh, i knowww

[Loki]

aG: Aaaaaaaaw, you are a past Rose!!!!!!!! Or an alternate Rose.
aG: 8ut yeah, I did a lot on the meteor.
aG: Then I got killed 8y Terezi ::::[
aG: Buuuuuuuut, now I'm a pirate, just like my Ancestor ::::]

[sleeplessCartoonist]

MS: I hAvE wAtchEd hIm dIE. SEvErAl tImEs. ThOUgh hE Isn't dEAd yEt.
MS: TrUthfUllY, fIndIng OUt thE scAndAlOUs blOOd cOlOUr Of yOUr mAtEsprIt Is jUst As AlArmIng As wAtchIng thEm dIE.
MS: ThOUgh hE clAIms wE ArE nO lOngEr mAtEsprIts. I thInk OUr rElAtIOnshIp Is stArtIng to Err On thE cAlIgInOUs sIdE, whIch cOncErns mE. EspEcIAllY sIncE I AlrEAdY hAvE A kIsmEsIs.
MS: BUt mY rElAtIOnshIp prOblEms wIth A sOOn-tO-bE ghOst Is nOt whY I Am hErE.
MS: I hAvE bEEn tOld sEvErAl tImEs thAt I hAvE AngEr IssUEs. I brOkE thE lEgs Of thE pEOplE whO tOld mE thAt, bUt I Am stArtIng tO thInk thE mUdblOOds wErE cOrrEct In A wAy.

[maieuticEpimenides]

TT: Oh, no. I've heard much about your exploits on the meteor. Your death included, Vriska.
TT: Hmm.
TT: Would you be so kind as to detail your precise location in time?
TT: I think it'd be best to straighten that out. For example. As of now I'm going through a recovery state in response to my repeatedly getting plastered over the last few years.
TT: That would be poor judgment on my part.
TT: Onto you, my dear. We must discuss the temper issues of the troll who I presume to be Haidan:
TT: Generally, good sir, human cultural norms would dictate that breaking legs can be labeled 'an overreaction.'
TT: It's considered several times more respectable to engage in spirited debate, or perhaps in some form of compromise, depending on the situation.
AA: have you considered a moirallegiance?
AA: it seems that youre experience a multitude of romantic issues as it is
AA: its unfortunate that trolls have a tendency to be so violent
AA: and im afraid those of higher blood castes such as yourself will almost undoubtedly experience these issues
AA: a functioning pale relationship would likely be the best solution
AA: of course we could try to work through some of your individual issues
AA: but in the end that would be best for you if possible
AA: you need not listen to me of course
AA: speaking as a "vaguely strange lowblood!"
PGD: well, it also depends on how deserving these broken-leg individuals are!!
AA: the implication was that anger issues had been the topic of their discussion
PGD: yeah, but you never know!
AA: im afraid assumptions are all we have
PGD: yes, and it SUCKS
PGD: but really MS, you're having all these issues with your concupiscent quadrants and anger
PGD: conciliatory's the way to go, man!
PGD: speaking as a somewhat-higher-than maroon cerulean blood with, like, no experience in conciliatory relationships...
FSP: God knows you need psome.
PGD: haaardly. i'm an extremely even-tempered troll!
FSP: Then I dont psee why you pseem to need to constantly piss me off to the point of breaking
PGD: it's fun?
FSP: I had a psinking psuspicion it was that.
FSP: Heeelp.
FSP: Check it out. Youve pushed me pso far Ive pstarted being psarcastically overdramatic. Wait, even better.
FSP: I W~O~NDER WH~O~ D~O~ES THAT?
FSP: Its comedy gold.
PGD: not really. i'm not laughing! look at this face
PGD: :/
PGD: not laughing by a mile! 
AA: need of auspisticism much?
TT: Oh, let them continue. It's mildly amusing.
AA: mildly being the important word here
PGD: also quirk mocking was a L~O~W move!
FSP: Pscroll through the memo. I distinctly remember psome pretentious little brat doing exactly the psame with my quirk.
PGD: you PSEE, i don't give a PSHIT!
PGD: seriously, you're the one that cares about this stuff
PGD: i have no worries regarding hypocrisy!
AA: id try to provide you two with some much needed advice
AA: but i get the terrible sense that itd go ignored
PGD: unfortunately, yes
FSP: Actually I wouldnt mind advice.
PGD: yes you would
PGD: or at least you'd listen until i open my mouth
PGD: at which point you'd just start whining and bitching about my existence again!
FSP: Youre lucky Im a civilized, well-mannered troll.
FSP: Because I pswear Id have murdered you psweeps ago if I wasnt.
PGD: ouch!
PGD: i sure am lucky you're a liar!
TT: Buuurn.
PGD: MS, don't be like us!
PGD: saaave yourself!
FSP: What the hell?
AA: ok everyone insanity period is over
AA: lets get back on schedule
AA: your thoughts haidan?
AA: and is there a particular area in which youre looking to improve your emotional state?
TT: Or are you merely looking for the all-around fix?
TT: In which case I believe Aradia suggested looking into filling your conciliatory quadrants.

[Loki]

aG: Weeeeeeeel, I am sailing through the Furthest Ring on a pirate ship.
aG: With a ghost crew/army.
aG: And Megido........
aG: Captor's here toooooooo. And Tavros. And my dancestor.

[maieuticEpimenides]

AA: sollux?
FSP: Who?
AA: im sorry to say this doesnt concern you fsp
AA: vriska i think im a bit in your future
AA: so say hi to past sollux for me!
AA: oh this is interesting
AA: give past me a warm greeting from the future as well
AA: tell me how it goes!
TT: Shouldn't you already know?
AA: yes of course
AA: but its still fascinating

[Loki]

aG:........Gog you are weird, Megido.
aG: Captor says 'hii' and you say that you return the greetings.
aG: You alsoooooooo said to be careful of what you say.
aG: Something about 'messing up the timeline' or something. I don't know.

[maieuticEpimenides]

AA: well someone needs to keep the loops tidy!
AA: and tell her she neednt worry about me
AA: im plenty aware of what im doing!
AA: as is she
AA: of course she probably already knows that
AA: our thought processes are extremely similar!

[Loki]

aG:........
aG: To quote an earth movie John showed me; 'I am not an owl'........
aG: Tell her yourself, Megido.

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